Friday, October 12, 2012

SPIDERS - hmmmmm....

More new and exciting things happening every day - life continues to be so great.  But I am gonna tell all about my confrontations with spiders - my arachnophobia.  Such horrible things, in my opinion.  While I do abhor unnecessary cruelty to animals, spiders are one -thing - that I am not friends with.  Huntsman spiders in particular - I will vacate a room for these huge, horrible, hairy things.  I have always been reassured they are actually completely harmless - but I have to question that - how can something possibly be harmless when they give me a heart attack every time I see one?  And we used to get them in abundance up on the station.  But several of my encounters with these things occurred in places other than the station, but I'll start up there.  This is possibly a good time to get a cuppa (or something stronger), put your legs up and settle in - or walk away.

I remember this little scenario as though it was yesterday.  I was riding happily ('happily'?  The temperature would have been well over 40C) on my bicycle, darting between the bushes on the side of the road on the hill behind our station homestead.  Suddenly I became vaguely aware of something on my right arm.  I remember slapping at it a couple of times and stopping it momentarily.  Then it would take off again.  Brrr - I still get the shivers when I think about it.  Another slap and another momentary stop.  Eventually I felt this - thing - heading toward my hand - and suddenly two very very very - try endlessly - long and very very very hairy legs appeared out of my cuffs (I must have been wearing long sleeves - in that heat?).  Well!  Did that set me off, or what!  I actually cannot remember anything much after that except screaming blue murder and running like the devil back down the hill to the house.  I must have been stripping all the way (first streaker on the station?) because by the time I had nearly reached our back door - and my mother who must have been running up the hill toward me, trying to find the snake (that, in her mind, being the only thing that could cause such crazed reaction) - I was stark naked.  The spider being long gone, along with my clothes.  Now, a 'few' years later, I also have to wonder - how in the heck is it possible to strip like that when running like that?  How the jolly heck did I undo and take my shoes and sox off and my long pants?  While running, for goodness sake?  I know I sure as hell didn't stop.  Why was I wearing it all in that heat in the first place?  Once Mum had established there wasn't a snake at all but a poor, 'defenceless' (yea right) little spider that had caused this (she must have been able to translate that much from my babbling), I was thoroughly berated and left to try to dress myself - which meant retracing my steps and collecting all my clothes - again in that unbearable heat and all the while, fully expecting that 'poor defenceless' little horror to pounce on me and gloat.  But until that moment I hadn't actually realised I wasn't wearing a stitch - but when that realisation did hit me - hmmmm - I turned a very nice shade of red.  On retracing my steps I also discovered I had an audience, albeit from afar - all the other kids were watching from the tank where they had been swimming.  Therein arises another question - why were they enjoying that water - and I wasn't???  Well, this happened just a 'few' years ago - when I was a child - so I guess all this will remain a mystery forever.

More exploits next blog.

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